Playing The Long Game
When I volunteered last week to write our post-election reflection, I admit I had a very different message in mind. Like many, I am still struggling to organize my thoughts. I’m sure they’re in there somewhere – underneath the angst, confusion, frustration, and dystopian visions. But wouldn’t you know, in rooting around in my psyche these last few days, I’m also finding glimmers of wisdom, understanding, and hope.
I do believe this election represents a deep-seated desire for change. People are recognizing that the current systems don’t serve them, and they’re looking for something—anything—that might.
While 48% of America might feel despondent, helpless, and resentful at the election result, it is important that we, too, find change where we can get it. And for better or worse, the chief thing in our control is our own hearts and minds.
While I do not wish to individualize a mighty systemic problem, I do find validity in the notion that “to heal the world, we must first heal ourselves.” We all have parts of “the other side” that we can barely tolerate, let alone love. Feelings of disgust, frustration, and self-righteousness that arise – however justified – are often projections. These defense mechanisms are clues, pinpointing wounded parts that may need tending. They reveal where we, ourselves, need love and understanding so that we can extend this compassion to others.
As much as I hate to say it, I don’t think that blame, judgment, and moralizing will bring our communities back together. Instead, I sense we are being called toward a deeper, and admittedly harder, commitment to inner depolarization: to soften rather than defend, to listen rather than shout. It’s annoying, vulnerable, and uncomfortable work, this acceptance and forgiveness thing, but loving across difference is the only thing that will create lasting change. This is not a call to bypass our emotions, people-please, or violate our own boundaries, but if anger is all we have, we’re fueling the same cycle we claim to despise.
The second piece of wisdom I’m clinging to regards the longer term. While this moment can feel catastrophic, I’m reminded of the parable of the Chinese farmer. In the abbreviated version of the story, a farmer’s horse runs away, and his neighbors come tutting their sympathies – “This is terrible news.” The farmer just shrugs – “Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t.” The very next day, his horse returns, bringing with it seven others. When the neighbors delight in his good fortune the farmer again replies “Maybe.” Not long after, the farmer’s son breaks his leg trying to tame the new horse. Though the neighbors mourn, the farmer remains unmoved. Because when army officers come to conscript the son, they pass on account of his broken leg. In other words, the seeming misfortune becomes a blessing.
Like the farmer, we don’t yet know where this path leads. This isn’t to sugarcoat the challenges ahead or commend a laissez faire attitude – we must absolutely continue the fight. However, the parable provides a reminder that setbacks often lay the groundwork for growth. Bottoms become breakthroughs, inspiring a new approach. As the platitude promises: “everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.”
So consider this a call to play the long game. For now, let’s work on what we can control – softening our hardened hearts and maintaining faith in the truism that the moral arc of the universe is long, but bends eternally toward justice.
